If you've read my Welcome to 2020 post, you will know that I have plans.
Notice that I do not call them "Resolutions".
I have been asked multiple times this year what my resolutions are for 2020. The truth is, I haven't made resolutions for many years. This is mostly because I find that they simply don't hold any sway over how I live my life. Resolutions, I find, are incredibly generic, often have ambitions that are too high given the circumstances, and don't feature any kind of plan behind them. I find that they simply don't give me enough direction to actually make any meaningful changes to how I live because they are far to easy to fall into the all-or-nothing trap.
I know, I can hear you saying "but aren't goals and resolutions the same thing?"
Yes and no.
Resolution: a firm decision to do or not to do something.
Goal: the object of a person's ambition or effort; an aim or desired result.
Again, I know. I hear you. They essentially say the same thing. The thing is, it's not the wording or meaning of the words that's important. It's the mindset.
A resolution is simply a decision - you vow to do or not do something and that's it. Resolutions exist on the idea that, with the use of a "magic switch", we can simply "stop drinking too much" or "lose weight". It has no plan, no preparation, and no guidance for realistic action.
A goal, by its very nature, involves intention-setting, planning and preparation. At school we are not encouraged to set resolutions; we are asked to set (S.M.A.R.T.) Goals or Targets. We learn to plot out how we intend to achieve these goals and consider what we need to do in order to maximise our likelihood of succeeding. Instead of the resolution "lose weight", we end up with "lose 4lbs by March". But the thing about goals is that they are adaptable. Because they have key focus points and realistic actions that help us to meet them, when we come upon a stumbling block we simply adapt the plan for the new objective. We reflect on goals and what we have done to achieve them so far. A resolution has no such requirement and thus, no way to truly measure how successful we have been. Because of this, any stumbling block feels like a failure and most people will give up.
After reading my previous post, you will know that I have a series of plans laid out and that I have given a little summary of what I want to achieve with those plans. Each of these has their own associated goals (some of which I have already achieved), but you may also have noticed that I have not detailed any of my detailed plans or sets to achieve those goals. When I made that post, I intentionally kept the specific details of the goals vague - goals are a deeply personal thing and it's ok to keep them close to the chest. How you plan and manage your goals is up to you, and only you. If it doesn't work and you find yourself stuck, asking for help is not a weakness. I frequently look to friends and family for thoughts and ideas, though I never share the full plan with them - only elements of it. Because, as much as I love them and I know they love me and mean well, sometimes they can lean on me to do things in a way that simply doesn't work for me. And, because I am a terrible "pleaser", I will often relent and do things their way, which ultimately leads to failure and a lot of frustration.
So, why not take your Resolutions and turn them into Goals? If you're anything like me, you will find it infinitely easier to achieve what you desire.